Thursday, February 19, 2009

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

not taking no for an answer

When your husband plans a Valentines weekend away, and you drive 8 hours to drop the kids off with the Grandparents, and it's your first time alone as a couple in 3 years...

Ain't NOTHING...

and I mean NOTHING is going to stand in your way!


Not a blizzard
Not a stern, grumpy highway patrolman
Not a jackknifed semi truck
Not chain requirements
Not a shut-down of a major interstate


NOTHING, I say!

We were not taking NO for an answer.

And so the story goes:


7:45 am
Couple left children in Sacramento with a kiss and hug.  Hopped in car for a weekend of kidless romance.

8:30 am
Couple was guided off the freeway at Applegate to install winter snow chains.  No problem.



8:45 am
In the 15 minutes it took male counterpart to install chains, there had been an accident and the freeway had been closed.  completely closed.  oh *&#@!  (that stands for schnikees)  This can't be happening.

9:00 am
Couple decides to forge ahead and finds a narrow, hilly side road that leads to another freeway onramp 10 miles ahead.  Couple sees no sign of CHP blocking entrance, so they enter.  Only ones on the road.



"Sweet" they thought, "We totally bucked the system"

9:45 am
Oh $*#@!^.  Stopped again.  Politely guided off the freeway by officials.  Wait...there's got to be another way.  Couple asked locals for some tips and were guided to a treacherous old highway not recommended for travel.  It was worth the risk.  (think no kids, romance, hot tubs, skiing)

10:15 am
Found another onramp clear for entrance.  Couple tried again.  Only ones on the road.



Could this be it?  "Are we free" they thought.
Oh *#@^@!*.  Once again, they were escorted off the Interstate.

10:20
This time a bit deflated.  Not sure what to do.  The couple sat and thought.  This can't be the end of the road.  Wait!  Is that the burgundy suburban they'd been following the entire time?  Follow him!  And they did.  Once again on side roads.  And once again to another open freeway onramp.  This time it was for good.
Free and Clear!  They'd made it.

10:30
UNTIL....CLINK, CLANK, BANG, KABOOM!
Oh, &#^@*!
Chain malfunction.  Male counterpart gets out to assess the situation. 




 Female counterpart turns heat up full blast to warm face and fingers.
Problem remedied.

10:45
CLINK, CLANK, BANG, KABOOM!
What now?

More chain malfunction.


Fixed.


11:00 am
CLINK, CLANK, BANG, KABOOM!
Seriously?
Yup.

11:15 am
You guessed it.
CLINK, CLANK, BANG, KABOOM!
%@*!^@*




11:45 am
Couple arrived at Squaw Valley.  Couple called CalTrans Freeway Hotline.  Traffic was still being held at Applegate.  Freeway closed.

VICTORY!
System Bucked!


And the reward was this:






Thank you, honey.  You really outdid yourself!
Thank you, mom and dad.  The kids were so well cared for.
Thank you, Chantel and Carl for the snow gear.


Tuesday, February 10, 2009

what she's been up to.


cooing
laughing
taking body slams from brother
eating adult food
getting two more top teeth
napping two (sometimes 3) times a day
growing a mullet
walking with her nifty walker


sleeping through the night
climbing 
coming down the stairs
falling down the stairs
clapping
signing "please" and "more"
taking off shirts
biting her crib rail
loving bathtime
getting giddy when dad comes home
bee-bopping to music

AND

helping me with my chores!


You are an absolute DELIGHT lucy!

Monday, February 2, 2009

bear with me on this one.

The events of yesterday got me thinking.

Thinking about the folks down in Colorado City, AZ.  And how maybe, just maybe, they are actually on to something good.

You see, yesterday Troy and I cooked and cooked.  A little of this and a little of that so that we could enjoy the company of friends and the comfort of good food.  

We made big messes.  

Messes that the men were clearly having NO part in.  Messes that stared you in the face screaming "clean me" while your full stomach was begging, "let me rest".

Now enter girlfriends.

They came to the rescue.  Within 15 minutes, three of us had the job done.  Floors swept, food put away, dishes washed and countertops wiped.  

So this is where my wheels started turning.  Really...would having a couple "sister wives" around be that bad?  I mean think of all the benefits:


(I've got mad photoshop skillz, yo)

1.  Your house would probably be immaculate.  Between the three of you, one could do the daily, routine tasks.  Another could take care of a big organizational project, and the third could focus solely on laundry.

2.  You would never have to go without stimulating adult conversation.  One of the "sisters" would always be around to chat with.

3.  You could tag team the children.  

4.  You could get on some kind of a rotation where one of the "sisters" stays home with the kids while the others could go shopping, or for a jog, or out to lunch.

5.  You could share clothes.  (Though pastel colored dresses with puffed sleeves might get old)

6.  Appointments would be so easy to schedule.  No worries of "who's going to watch my kids?" or "how will they behave in that 10x10 foot office space?"  Say hello to fresh highlights every 8 weeks on the dot!

7.  Puny errands would be so easy.  The kids could be left in their carseats with the other sister wives while you just "run in" to grab something.

Ladies...the list is ENDLESS!  

I really think that Colorado City might be sitting on the best kept secret in the West!

ONLY ONE CONDITION:  Sister wives must leave the premises before MY MAN comes home at 6:30 pm.  No exceptions.