I was on the floor, yo! Did you all catch the "race walking" event? I was so confused when I tuned in that I had to look it up online. Here is some of the commentary I found on this amazing Olympic sport:
"Did they really need a slo-mo at the end? I think it was slow enough to begin with..."
"Yes, it's real. Real stupid."
"Moving as fast as you can without actually moving as fast as you can seems like something that should be celebrated on an international level."
"All those people look like they are trying to get to the toilet without messing their pants."
"I think they train by sticking a corncob between their "cheeks" and walking real fast."
"Just remember the mantra: Don't look like a dork"
"Arms are pumping, legs are driving and hips are confused."
All jokes aside. Props to those athletes who are "walking" faster than I could sprint a mile! I just wish I could pay someone to yell "quack" from the middle of the pack. Now that would be priceless.